2 Group Photos and a Handsome Guy

HAPPY BIRTHDAY ESTHER!!





MESMERISING SINGING FROM DANIEL~!!




MR MUSCULAR HIMSELF

Why the goverment raised our ERP Rates

Last saturday night while i was at PS awaiting a bus home, i witness a wondrous sight to behold. And i finally figured out the real reason on why the government raised our ERP rates.





FIREWORKS!! *BANG BANG BANG*

Yeah wooo~~!! so nice so fun so cute!! They're having NDP 2008 rehearsals! how spectacular and glamourous. Go Singapore!



WHAT RUBBISH/NONSENSE/CRAP/MADNESS


To my horror, a glance at my watch revealed that it was only 21st June! Absolutely shocking. I've never seen fireworks being let off so early before? In the past, a humble Singapore would only allow the fireworks to shoot off earliest on the 2nd last rehearsal. Now we're still only 7 rehearsals away, yet the gah-ment decides to let fly these deadly multi-coloured, floral-patterned, money-blowing, greenhouse gas-releasing, sparks-in-your-eye dropping FIREWORKS! Give me a break.

Have you ever thought where the money used to buy these fireworks come from? YES!! Your parents' pockets! Your uncles' pockets! It could even come from your pocket when you buy those cigarettes/alcohol!

Fireworks are almost practically, in my opinion, something like this:

The fireworks rocket-releasing-whatever-thingamajig is put on the ground, then before the guy lights up the firework, he stuffs all your parents' & family's and friends' and YOUR money into the bottom of the rocket, before lighting the ignition thingy along with all your money. Then BOOM! All your money flies into the air and explodes in a multitude of colours! Isn't that just beautiful?

Oh so now the economy is prosperous and our wonderful gah-ment decides to splurge on fireworks. Not only that, to fund their fireworks spending, they actually go on to...


RAISE ERP RATES!! Nice. Now u know the real reason why the gah-ment does such profound things. Think about it, people in China are suffering from the massive earthquake, a hurricane struck Myanmar recently, many Singaporeans still live in poverty, yet this is the best we can do. Imagine your close friend, your next-door neighbour, your family member, someone has come down with a serious illness. Maybe you pay them a little visit, give them a nice little flower. Smile a little. THEN GO HOME AND PARTY!! OKAAAYYYYYYYY~!!!

The least our kind little Pedra Branca-loving noble gah-ment could do, was to blast those darned fireworks only on the 2nd last rehearsal, and donate the rest of the fireworks money to the Singapore needy!! Don't always put up those dumb corrupted, celebrity-i'm-so-pitiful-when-i-train-for-this-stunt-sob-tear-cry CHARITY SHOWS that absolutely RIP US OFF. Instead, make some real direct contributions to those in need. SACRIFICE what you wanted to do and donate it! I mean just donating what's convenient is so insincere and pathetic.


EVEN MORE CRUCIAL than the financial effect is the environmental effect of these fireworks. In an era when the Earth is dying, people want to go green, our dear fireworks are a step backward. Check this excerpt i got from a website:


Fireworks Can Be Toxic to Humans
Depending on the effect sought, fireworks produce smoke and dust that contain various heavy metals, sulfur-coal compounds and other noxious chemicals. Barium, for instance, is used to produce brilliant green colors in fireworks displays, despite being poisonous and radioactive. Copper compounds are used to produce blue colors, even though they contain dioxin, which has been linked to cancer. Cadmium, lithium, antimony, rubidium, strontium, lead and potassium nitrate are also commonly used to produce different effects, even though they can cause a host of respiratory and other health problems.

Fireworks Contribute to Environmental Pollution
The chemicals and heavy metals used in fireworks also take their toll on the environment, sometimes contributing to water supply contamination and even acid rain. Their use also deposits physical litter on the ground and into water bodies for miles around. As such, some U.S. states and local governments restrict the use of fireworks in accordance with guidelines set by the Clean Air Act. The American Pyrotechnics Association provides a free online directory of state laws across the U.S. regulating the use of fireworks.

Fireworks Add to Worldwide Pollution
Of course, fireworks displays are not limited to U.S. Independence Day celebrations. Fireworks use is increasing in popularity around the world, including in countries without strict air pollution standards. According to The Ecologist, millennium celebrations in 2000 caused environmental pollution worldwide, filling skies over populated areas with “carcinogenic sulphur compounds and airborne arsenic.”

Do We Really Need Fireworks?
While Disney’s technological breakthrough is no doubt a step in the right direction, many environmental and public safety advocates would rather see the Fourth of July and other holidays and events celebrated without the use of pyrotechnics. Parades and block parties are some obvious alternatives. Meanwhile, laser light shows can wow a crowd without the negative environmental side effects associated with fireworks.



Will you still go WOW when you see the fireworks on 9 August? I won't.

SOC Poem

by Glen Muscular Tan




Standard Obstacle Course.
The thought of it makes me groan till i'm hoarse.
A crazy timing to beat of 9:30,
really makes me feel like playing dirty.

Weidong told me "you better pass,
or we will surely whoop your arse"
I said "hey my biceps will pull me through,
but right now i need to go to the loo"

But the day before the test,
temptations arrived with utmost zest.
Unfortunately, i succumbed with much ease,
my stomach i had to please.

In came congalala with a box of doughnuts,
and i thought "oh my what a slut"
I gobbled down oreo, chocolate, durian
without even feeling a wee bit sian

Then at night we had steamboat,
delightful but i wish it came with a root beer float.
Hotdogs, fishballs, prawns in the hot pail,
"I hope this won't be a reason for me to fail"

Then came thursday morning,
with waking up at 6am came much scorning.
ARgh, time to prepare for SOC,
but first i had to brush my teeth and take a pee.

After breakfast formed up at Alpha Coy,
with my rifle slung much like a toy.
The delays, warmup, and briefing did not fail to annoy,
"I hope all these end up in joy"

Then to the start point we started walking,
trying to calm my nerves i started talking.
The officers weren't satisfied so they made everyone jog,
And i though "man this is dumber than my blog!"

Reaching the start point i was already panting,
no time to waste though, this was the moment of reckoning.
I was put in the first detail,
YEAH! no more lack of low ropes to make me fail.

GO!! and off we were!
In a flash the two officers were gone, just like a blur.
Undeterred, I maintained myself at a steady pace,
knowing that i would still eventually win this race!!

Winding through the warehouses was my least fave,
but I was soon joined by my pacers/slaves.
"COME ON!!" came their war cry,
"Yeah, yeah u think so easy? wanna try?"

Daniel, Shuo Xian and Weesong,
with their encouragement i could never go wrong.
Towards the low wall i advanced,
never wasting time to turn around and glance.

Scaling the wall without a hitch,
Darn! the parallel bar's gonna be a b*tch
But utilising my bulging biceps,
I completed it so well i could have done a 100 reps.

Guess what's the swing trainer?
It's a monkey bar, what a no-brainer!
Even though i could swing through it like a monkey,
I could never be a primate cos i'm so hunky.

Then came the demon, the low rope.
But looking up i saw much hope!
There were ropes for me to climb,
and up i was in no time!

Using almost zero technique and just arm strength,
I stretched out at maximum length!
*ting* i touched the metal pole,
YES! I've reached my goal.

With glee i quickly jumped off,
not before i took a little cough.
I looked back and saw the struggling officers,
"HAHA cya later suckers!"

Taking my time over the rest of the stations,
Hmm i really felt like taking a vacation.
Weidong yelled at me to run,
but what i really needed was a nice warm char siew bun.

Jumping off the low ramp,
Weesong shouted 6:10!
And i sprinted off like a speed demon,
just that it was in the wrong direction.

I made one whole long round,
just like a bloody big clown.
The marshallers' and slaves' warnings i did not hear,
and everything around was a blur.

Yet i am the one and only speed king,
Yoyo check out my bling bling.
My legs were starting to ache,
i need to take a break!

But with the thought of the entire platoon's eternal suanning,
i just had to continue running.
Past the spartan wall, past the foyer!
"SOC sucks!! After this, i want to see my lawyer!"

Yes, the end was near.
Out from my eye streamed down a little tear.
But i wiped it off with my hand,
because now i am a REAL MAN.

As Shuo xian said "open up!"
I thought he was holding a can of 7-up.
But after much thinking i got the hint,
he just wanted me to sprint.

With my last burst i gave it my all,
just like my mum heading to the mall.
I crossed the finishing line like a shining mare,
with 17 seconds left to spare!

I was over the moon,
never going to run this dumb thing again like a baboon.
It was obvious this one thing,
today Muscular Tan was king.

I hastily unclipped my helmet strap,
allowing it to flap.
When it dropped and hit the floor, *kang!*
then i told Daniel, SOC is yi ru fan zhang.

How to bargain with a Thai

Btw this is not by me.

Lets begin.

Bargaining is a part of market life for most Thais, so, before you stock up on all those souvenirs and handicraft goodies, you need a little practice. Consider this conversation...

You: "Sawadee krap/ka, nee tao rai na krap/ka?" (Hello, how much is this?). Your opening gambit should always be in Thai, this way they take you for a local ex-pat and assume you are less gullible; their opening gambit will almost certainly be more realistic. So, learn this phrase by heart (remember guys say 'krap' and girls say 'ka').

Them: Two hundred baht.

You: Two hundred baht, you're kidding, is this one from Bangkok? In Bangkok, I pay two hundred baht for much better quality. Maybe you drive all way to Bangkok buy this one, you get bad price, yes? (Thais love a bit of humour).

Them: (laughing) This one good quality sure, I buy from factory one hundred and fifty baht. Not buy Bangkok, Bangkok more expensive, maybe three hundred baht.

You: Three hundred baht? Where? Maybe you buy three hundred in Phuket, tourist in Phuket have too much money, Chiang Mai very cheap, I ask lady over there how much, she say one hundred baht. Maybe this one made with gold for two hundred baht sure!

Them: (laughing) Yes made gold sure, two hundred good price sure. You want? How many you buy, can make good price for you.

You: I buy already in Bangkok, I get good price, only fifty baht sure!

Them: (laughing in disbelief) Ah, cannot, fifty baht not enough, buy from factory more than one hundred baht.

You: Okay, I go factory tomorrow. Less than one hundred baht for sure. Here velly expensive. I like to buy from you, you very beautiful/handsome/friendly/whatever (Thais love flattery).

Them: Okay, one hundred fifty baht, special for you. You take five I give for six hundred baht all.

You: How about twenty, what price, nine hundred baht?

Them: (laughing) Aaeeeii, no can do. Five, six hundred baht. Buy for wife, children, all. You have wife/husband? (You get this question often).

You: Have wife many, too many, give headache, must buy for all but not enough money (Again, Thais love humour, it softens them up.)

Them: (laughing) Many wife! You butterfly. Okay, I give you five hundred baht, five, special price for you.

You: Thank you, only need three, how much three, three hundred baht?

Them: Ah, cannot, three hundred too little. Please mister/miss, must feed baby (a popular imaginary accessory), work here every night, now foreigner few, no business (reverse psychology, softening you up).

You: Okay, this shop I buy many thing, shirt, book, souvenir, all together, then you give good price okay.

Them: I have many thing, you like this velly cheap… (this is where they try offloading their whole stall on you, suddenly getting wildly optimistic and excited).

You: (deliver coup de grace, suddenly change your mind, say no thanks and abruptly walk away slowly)

Them: (come running after you with original product) Okay, mister/miss, I give you eighty baht, best price, please, nowhere cheaper.

You: Eighty baht? Seventy.

Them: (no longer laughing, looking at you with killer emotional blackmail expression). Eighty.

You: Okay, eighty baht, I take three.

(At this point you become altruistic and use your leverage to tip them nicely, give him/her ninety or a hundred baht for each one, they appreciate the gesture, all smiles, everyone happy.)

*She probably bought it for fifty baht, but these people make very little, be kind, a hundred baht is no more than a couple of bucks.

euro 2008 update

alas, one of the great advantages of my 4-day escapade to chiang mai was the opportunity to catch some euro2008 matches in the comfort of a wonderful hotel room, something which of course, most of my army-bound friends couldn't enjoy.

I would still love the czechs to win, but they were crushed by portugal. absolutely destroyed, but i would still think they will progress past the group stages.

The dutch, however, have slammed me upside down. seriously they are damn good and i forgot to take into account the fact that the once-young stars are now at a ripe age to take over the world. also i didn't quite expect the two most lethal left foots in europe, robben and van persie, to be back so soon. but when u have quality like sneijder and van der vaart and de jong in the middle, along with a wonderful strike-combi of kuyt (hardworking) and van nistelrooy (anyhow han tum still score), this is the stuff of champions. of course in my opinion their defence is still suspect but they have proved me wrong so far. van der sar seems just too solid.

france and italy completely suck. i expected them to, but i thought the dutch would suck more. honestly it is just down to the coaches.

domenech is one of the worst squad-pickers i have ever seen in my life. he leaves out the best, and brings all his personal favourites on to the tournament. he left out flamini and brought toulalan, he left clichy and took along abidal, he left SAGNA at home and brought sagnol, biggest joke ever. how about the rejuvenated Cisse? nah, bring Gomis and Govou to euro instead. 36 year old thuram, ok.. boumsong to complete the puzzle. sorry but this guy's choices are a joke. malouda WHAT?!!? Oh and don't forget that the Serie A's top scorer was left at home to lick his toes.

donadoni, is pure italian throughout. he employs his team to play the most boring football ever, and expects his team to be able to scrape all those 1-0 wins again. sorry dude, ur defence sucks!!! once upon a time there was Alessandro Nesta and Fabio Cannavaro, and a humble Marco Materazzi. now? u have a cocky Materazzi, old man panucci, it's too much to take. Not even Buffon can save Italy (and the goals they concede). Yesterday's match against romania was an eyesore. I mean 80-90% of Italy's shots came from headers. can't u guys come up with something new? some neat ownage dribble and shot into the top corner or something?

By some luck, both the World Cup finalists still have a chance of qualifying, but whats the point? they're gonna get knocked out soon anyway.

Holland FTW. Beautiful football is back.

narnia

Yesterday i went to watch Chronicles Of Narnia: Prince Caspian!

Nar -- ni -- a? u might ask.

Suntec City, 2.30pm.

A good two hours 20 min spent in the cinema with family and mary. delightful...
Met up with the bowling people for supper, unfortunately I was so drained by then. Almost no sleep since thursday (no thanks to ops vl) so i was holding on..

went home after that, EURO 2008!!! What better way to start than hosts Switzerland against perennial black horses Czech Republic.

Yes, 5 minutes of the match and it was over.. well not quite. i just dozed off! ha ha for the hundredth time. looks like the lack of sleep was just too powerful and my biceps needed some rest.

Have i ever told u about the time i wanted to catch a 2.30 am champions league match on tv, Arsenal vs Valencia. Very important match. I tried and toiled so hard to stay up till 2.30am, forcing myself to sit up and play FM until 2.30am, dozing off on a few occasions.

and finally the time had come and i turned on the tv, got the drinks and chips, adjusting my sitting position to the most comfortable. wait sitting like this is not comfortable enough, so is sitting like this.. ah why not i just lie down.

Before u know it, it was 5 am, match just over. THANKS, totally pissed.

Speaking of football. EURO 2008 has started!!!

Fantabulous la. Czech and Portugal got off to great but expected winning starts yesterday. I must say i hope Portugal win, but something tells me the final will have the Czechs inside.

Let me show off my prophetic skills and try to predict the qualifiers from each group. (haha easy i know)

Group A: Portugal, Czech Republic, Switzerland, Turkey

Muscular Glen's prediction: This is easy, portugal is just too good. the Czechs boast a mean defence with 4 very very very good defenders, Jankulovski, Grygera, Ujfalusi, Galasek. Amazing! a sure qualifier, and maybe even all the way. Switzerland may boast excellent players like barnetta and behrami, but they lost Frei last night, and thats it. Come on their best defender is like Senderos.. lol

Group B: Poland, Austria, Germany, Croatia

Muscular Glen's prediction: I wun say obvious, but it seems like the automatic choice would be Germany, with their stars and all. Croatia may have lost eduardo but they still have the super pro niko kranjcar. I think these 2 will go through. Sorry austria, no chance, but go ahead and surprise me.

Group C: Italy, Netherlands, Romania, France

Muscular Glen's prediction: CRAP. GROUP OF DEATH. this is a toughie. As world champions, u don't expect Italy to screw up here. But netherlands and france both stand an equal chance.. but i'm leaning towards France. Netherlands have too many injuries.

Group D: Spain, Russia, Greece, Sweden

Muscular Glen's prediction: This is an easy one i would say. Spain have great players and might even go on to finally win this after Raul finally got told to stay at home. haha too bad. But Russia have a SUPERB team. they are the dark horses here i might say. No one knows much about them and thats what makes them so good. expect greece to be steamrolled here. Sweden are so desperate that they even recalled henrik larsson to the team. THANKS AH.

The rest of the predictions will come another time.

2 MORE DAYS TO CHIANG MAI!!! WOOOT

deployment!!

Hello, today i have a riddle for all.

Qn: What/who is the main inspiration behind Glen's jokes?


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Ans: My TOE!! Cos it makes me SO LAME!! ~wakakakakak~


On to other things..


YAY MARY IS BACK~!!! WELCOME HOME!!! I'M SO GLAD~~!!!

sigh 2 weeks of freedom, over, just like that.. HAHA JK!!!

When you were gone, i felt like a maize corn without any of the yellow corn bits :(
but now that u're back, i feel so corny all over again!! just like the corn on cob i ate today!! wahahahahah~~ the gap has been filled ! :)



on to other news...

OH MY GALACTUS!! time to catch Mas Selamat again!

MAS i do it??
SELAMAT hari raya!
KASTARI is Mas's father

byebye